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Juanita Bynum
A True “False Prophet”
Many of God’s servants started out with a sincere motive to preach the Gospel, but because of the “Love” of money, many have fallen away from their first love (Christ) and cling to money, money and more money. This is a prime example.
Juanita Bynum’s “Emergency Prayer Kits” Causes Strange Fire On The Home Shopping Network Set.
Prophetess Juanita Bynum, a popular TBN regular, was a featured seller on the Home Shopping Network Saturday. Dressed in a stunning long white gown, Ms. Bynum was captivating to watch as she peddled her $500 emergency prayer kit, complete with a Hebrew prayer shawl, a small vial of anointing oil, and gospel teaching tapes. Amazingly, in the first hour the profiteer sold more than 3,500 kits, with the charmed ease of a seasoned and shrewd used car saleswoman.
But as she began the second hour, repeatedly using the spiel “This powerful intercessory package has become mandated by God to become a primary weapon in your personal prayer arsenal! Your emergency kit contains everything you need to discover true power in prayer! ‘Buy one, or even two, now today!’ thus saith the Lord,” suddenly a stack of nearby prayer kits caught fire. Within seconds, the entire set was consumed by flames. Luckily, everyone survived the accident, although the prayer kits were all destroyed.
The cause of the fire is still unknown; fire chief Sam Storner had this to say just yesterday: “We’ve ruled out arson, faulty wiring, cigarettes, spontaneous combustion, gas, grease, etc. as triggers of this blaze, and right now we’re stumped.”
Marcus Jillian, a private investigator for Allexium Insurance, which handles HSN, thinks he has the answer: “The oil in the prayer kits fueled the strange fire, but I’m still searching for the cause of the spark.”
Renowned charismatic prophet Clem Kiment thinks God’s anger was the spark: “Our Lord has had enough of today’s superapostles merchandising the Holy Spirit. The only emergency prayer kit a believer actually needs is the Holy Ghost Himself, and He’s simply not for sale!” he wrote today on his website “The Sound of Free Freedom.”
The prophetess, however, remained undeterred by the accident. “I’m coming back next week with 10,000 more prayer kits, plus my new $5,000 Juanita Bynum fountain pens. All truly prosperous King’s kids should own and be using one or more these classy pens to write with; Bics are for those ignorant still living under the curse of poverty.”
This story is satire and was posted on the following website:
13 Responses to GOD Will Not Be Mocked – Juanita Bynum
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June 15th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
At the bottom of the post it says “Note: this is satire.” That means it’s not true but based on some truth. The truth is the prayer kits are real, selling them is “strange fire,” but there was no fire on HSN nor was JB on HSN.
The video reveals more truth than the satire. Still yet I wanted you to know that it was made up just incase someone ask you if it true or not. Love you in Christ Bro
June 23rd, 2008 at 1:51 pm
who is “Renowned charismatic prophet Clem Kiment”?
June 29th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
Blessings Jessie. The “Renowned charismatic prophet Clem Kiment” is a made up name in this satire.
December 22nd, 2008 at 4:49 am
Hi
To be frank I am startled by the remarks I hear of Juanita Bynum because here in Africa particularly Nigeria, she is revered and adored as a classic styled woman of God. Her music is captivating and sells like hot cake and considered a master’s piece work of art for choirs, churches, gospel groups and vocalists of all levels irrespectively.
But it is shocking to hear of her divorce her spend thrift and the so much we Africans will be shocked to hear of our own admirable Juanita Bynum. Nonetheless we as a church all around irrespective of race, color and denomination should rise and pray strongly for our dear daughter of zion and avoid cutting her in shreds before the world because if she fails in her God given destiny, we all fail and the world will laugh. Please bishops, prophets, evangelists, pastors etc, please pray and support her. Dear Juanita Bynum as for me I will always love you like Christ loved me when I was smelling and repelling. I am neither better in my Christian walk so I will not cast a stone at you.
You remain our model of praise and worship in our time.
Love you 4 Life
January 6th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
I am not one to place my mouth on anyone. I am however, going to remain prayerful for all the people of God. I cannot place my mouth on Dr. Bynum, rather I am going to pray for her and her ministry. My life has been impacted in great ways through her ministry. One thing we as believers in Christ must realize is that non of us have arrived and we are yet striving as long as we are in this world to live a life pleasing to Jesus Christ. We have to pray for people in leadership positions
March 12th, 2009 at 9:28 am
Question, how does one meditate on God’s word all day long, i know it takes preserverance, how do u start at it. love need help.
March 12th, 2009 at 9:40 am
Lynette, I totally agree with you about our mouth it can get us in a whole world of trouble when over-running it on carnal things rather then godly words of prayer for one another than pulling each other down, guilty! Evil words kill not build, it would be better for to build than to tear down, especially the people of God no matter what the situation is we pray, we love, we bear one another, with covering our brothers and sisters in the love of God, suppose expose us with all the acts we have done or is doing, how would we glorify God in it, we would be wasting time when souls are wasting away we’re attacking watch other stop the madness!!! The enemy is being lifted up, it doesn’t do anything for the Kingdom of God. quote….
June 3rd, 2009 at 12:13 pm
get a life and make sure, you clean your
own life first before you start digging
someone else, i guess you got nothing better to do except watch and critized other people. your really need to look at your own life and ask the lord to clean you up! ok
August 1st, 2009 at 9:42 am
It’s wonderful to see men of God standing on the infallible Word of God. I read some of the negative comments from some people on here and what these people have to realize is that they are shooting the messenger. In Gods word He says what He means and means what He says. So it is the messenger’s job to deliver it accordingly. Whether or not they are “cleaning their own life” is no more our business (unless it directly effects us) than it is their business, if they preach the gospel, and yet we still decide to do what we wanna do. These men of God are doing their jobs if they are not right with God then they will have to answer to Him, not us, on a much higher level
September 26th, 2009 at 5:25 am
I typed in emergency prayer and this story came up! I said what? a prayer for sale? Its understandable when christian sites sell their books and magazines and shawls to the public, but yes I do agree with Kim Clement, Jesus did not put up the Lord’s prayer for sale!
October 2nd, 2009 at 6:43 pm
I would love to meditate all day long on the word daily,I know it would be strenght,and would bring us closer to God’s heart.I would like to read up on those who truly meditate all day,anyone out there of any author’s,who can help us in this area?
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:59 am
this was a false statement…she wasnt even on the show…check ur resoures before u post things…this article is totally false…
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:44 pm
Mr Little:
Grab your dictionary and check the meaning of “satire”…
Note this line at the end of the article:
“This story is satire and was posted on the following website:…”